Birthparent Services

Over the years, the Birthparent Services staff at The Cradle has seen an exceptionally wide range of emotion. These counselors are the first point of contact for expectant women considering a plan of adoption—a decision that does not come easily. Director Pat Trudeau, however, reminds us that the process is different for each birthmother.

“We talk with them, help them around ambivalence, around grief and loss and around preparing them for those feelings that are really typical and very expected as part of considering adoption,” Pat explained. 

She said that the women who call The Cradle range in age from early teens to early 40s, and that many of them come from difficult family and/or home situations. Ten percent of the women who call end up finalizing a plan of adoption, but The Cradle provides services to these women whether or not they decide to parent.

“We are available for counseling services after they make a plan of adoption.  We are available short-term if they decide to parent,” Pat said. “We can really work with a mom who makes a plan of adoption on a regular basis, up to about six months.” The goal of these meetings is to provide emotional support for the birth mother and if the woman has chosen an open plan of adoption, to work out details surrounding that, as well.

And although the goal is to work with a mother throughout the course of her pregnancy, some women do not call The Cradle until after the baby is born. This happens for a variety of reasons—some women have kept the pregnancy a secret, while others have been misinformed about the adoption process.

Pat said that The Cradle gets about 60 or 70 calls of this type every year. “It tends to be a higher percentage of those women actually make a plan of adoption than decide to parent, but of course we’re offering the same services and the same counseling opportunities to them,” she noted.

The Birthparent Services staff meets these women at the hospital usually the day after the baby is born to discuss her options.  In these cases, The Cradle Nursery is a helpful resource as the mother decides on a plan. “You can’t collapse that process into a few days,” Pat explained. “It just wouldn’t offer her enough time really to recover, to get used to the idea that there is a baby here and to really think about her options in depth.”

Some women need financial assistance from The Cradle as they decide on a plan for their babies.  This can be anything related to the wellbeing of the mother as she decides on the best path for her baby—even assisting with housing costs. It is the hope of The Cradle and Birthparent Services that we have enough funding to offer these financial services to expectant parents in need.

“We just allow the process to unfold and are there as sounding boards, listeners, providers of information and education,” Pat said. “We let the mom know about her choices every step of the way, but respect what choices she makes in the end.”